Father Of The Year contender Keith said,

“I didn't see what was wrong with taking little Lily along with me as a sales tool rather like the homeless lads do with dogs.”

Quick question: is it worse that he took her along or that he didn’t see anything wrong with it?

He went on to explain: “Cute puppy guarantees punters will stop and stroke it and therefore give you money. Lil' sat next to the stall, gurgling in a pushchair, while I cranked up the sales patter and knocked out the lager,”

This man could teach Britney or Kerry Katona a thing or two.